That frozen moment...
This post is courtesy of Fearless Husband--though he doesn't know it. Hopefully, he never finds this particular blog. But I got the best laugh I've had in a long time out of it, and just had to share:The moment of "oh shit."
The moment of "oh shit" is that single spot in time when you realize exactly what you fucked up. I had a moment like that today. Our ship pulled in to Nameless Port for refueling, and of course had to pull out again the same day, so there was no opportunity to go to the base. Since we also had a scheduled downtime with our internet connection, I took the opportunity to sleep after the watch I had last night.
F. , my fellow First Class woke me up at noon to let me know that people were allowed off the ship to get the local facilities on Nameless Beach, including the laundromat. In about three minutes, I was up, dressed in shorts and short sleeved shirt, and had the laundry, detergent, and sheets in the seabag. I then walked over to the laundromat.
On the way out I was scanned and had my bag searched, which seemed odd. The Marine who had to go through my seabag full of dirty laundry was not amused, saying "I'm not getting paid enough for this shit". He also accidentally ripped the side of my laundry detergent box with his weapon. I agreed with him and headed out to the laundry.
There was a sign-up sheet which I filled out, but of course that really didn't matter. There was a virtual herd of people trying to get laundry done in the four hours before the ship pulled out, so politeness was not an option. I managed to get my two machines finally, dumped in the soap and 2 dollars in quarters, cleaned out the lint trap, started the 45 minute cycle then staggered outside, relieved that one task was down.
I then spent the time talking to some of my fellow sailors from the shop, reading a little bit and calling you. About 30 minutes later I headed in to check on the machines. They were running fine, but something seemed off. I couldn't put my finger on it, so I shrugged and opened up the machine. Thats when I saw the white crystals of the detergent in a nice clean pile in the lint trap. That was the "oh shit" moment.
Yep, I put all the dirty laundry in the dryer instead of the washer. I was tired, and hungry so that might have been part of it. As I looked around the laundry room I also saw that it looked pretty similar to the laundry room I had in the apartment in Arizona, and other places I've done laundry. The exception was that this time the front loaded washers were mounted on the walls instead of dryers, and the top loaded dryers were in the front instead of what I was used to.
So anyway, here I am going "oh crap," and grabbing the laundry in one hand and seabag in the other hand to start scooping in the stuff before anyone realizes that I'm already done with laundry even though I came in well after them. A. sees me pulling laundry out and says "Hey can I use that dryer?" I'm nodding and finishing with stuffing all of my laundry into the bag. She then looks at the lint trap, and I see her brow furrowing as she tries to figure out why there is detergent in the dryer. I point at the box on top of the dryer, side torn from where the Marine had earlier broken it, with detergent leaking out. We both nod, her relieved at figuring that the detergent spilled and me that my secret was safe.
It's too late for me to put it in for the next load so I decide to cut my losses and head back. As I start to step away, F. says "oh, giving up for now?" Right as I say "yeah," A. steps out and I see the brow furrow again, because she just saw me pull stuff out of the dryer. Luckily her phone rang right then so I made a run for it.
So now I have a bunch of dirty laundry that smells clean. I guess I'll hold out for two days and do laundry on the ship when they get the water thing fixed, hopefully with the right machines this time.
Love,
Fearless Husband
posted by Carolie @ 11:38 PM
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